Fun With Play-Dough

Psychologist Gian Gonzaga recently conducted a study at UCLA trying to answer the question, why do we cheat?  It’s a good question, especially this week. Even though we don’t really want to know why when it comes to politicians; we mostly want to know what, with who, and when. Oh, and how often and how much did it cost. And then we want the story repeated on the news 500 times, in case we missed something.

“When it comes to resisting sexual temptation and remaining faithful to one’s partner in life, The Beatles got it right: All You Need Is Love. A new study published Wednesday said that people who are in love with their partners are less attracted to other people.”

Really? But all those cheating husbands always say they really love their wives. Weird!

The study goes on to say:

“But when it comes to love and lust, this otherwise reliable human trait — get it while you can — leads to a paradox: Why do people in stable relationships so often pass up the chance for a little sexual gratification on the side, even if they can get away with it?”

Because we’re not stupid, that’s why. It has nothing to do with having morals or being a stronger or better person; it’s all about street smarts. When you cheat, people find out (don’t shake your head, you know they will sooner or later…) and then you’ll be in trouble.  Deep trouble. The kind of trouble that comes for a visit, makes itself comfortable, and stays a while. And just in case your partner really doesn’t have a clue, you’ll have to be on your toes for the rest of your life.

Read the full article:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/sciencepsychologysexloveoffbeat;_ylt=Ai4QIfe3NosGD7PAEIHM1r0jr7sF

We have: sex industry (yes, we’re not done), mortgage crisis, and primary woes. 

Yum; more sex talk on Larry King tonight. Good old Larry, I knew he would milk this like an overripe cow.  Not even there, and he still manages to pull the sex strings. I imagine him saying; hey, I can’t make it tonight, but can somebody make sure the topic is sex, sex, and more sex? Oh, I know! We’ll get Dr. Drew! Isn’t he sort of bored anyway, now that Celebrity Rehab is over and done with?

Hurrah for Sex.

My husband had a great idea. How about the government, instead of dumping their money on Wall Street, or giving us a tax cut that, let’s face it, really isn’t going to help anybody, buys up all the houses that are for sale right now? From what we’re hearing, people are having a bit of difficulty selling their houses. They can put returning service men in these houses, and the people that they buy from can move on and buy a new house; there would be a ripple effect, and voilà, housing market improves. There. 

One Florida voter said he had no appetite for another primary, and he added: This is a great lesson for the National Democratic Party.

What lesson would that be? Don’t tell Florida what to do because they can’t effing follow instructions? 

I have the prefect solution. We take every single politician in Florida, put him or her in jail for a week or two, preferably solitary lock-up, then we ask them: Are you ready to play ball? If they hem and haw, we throw them in the sea and tell them not to come back.

Then we’ll give all of Florida to Louisiana; they could use the tourism and besides, as shady as Louisiana’s reputation is when it comes to politics, at least they didn’t screw up the primary. 

Madams and Hookers and Pimps, oh my.

It seems Mr. Spitzer has handed the media a fantastic excuse for bringing the business of sex front and center. Finally, the American public has an almost Hollywood like backdrop for smut-talk. It is just like the movies, isn’t it? Pretty girls, down on their luck, the Johns that sleep with them, huge amounts of money changing hands; oh, the scandal, the horror! Except this time it’s not HBO, it’s real life, or a facsimile thereof.

Bring on Dr. Laura, our favorite homo-hating drama queen, spilling her condescending guts all over the television screen; Pah-Leeze. Of course she has all the answers; hearing her talk, for the first time in days I find some sympathy for Spitzer. However bad the choices he’s made, he doesn’t deserve this.  Could someone please dig in her past for a bit and find something that will shut her up for good?

What expert guests will be on tomorrow night to put in their two cents’ worth? I vote for Tony Soprano, and bring on Hugh Grant and a couple of strung-out crack addicts while you’re at it.  I bet they will be more informative and easier to watch than Dr. Laura.

Maybe the anchors can dress for the occasion; after all, it’s almost Purim. That means it’s high time for an entertaining Farce.

Look it up. 

Suddenly, all we talk about is sex, prostitutes, sex-addiction, adultery, and more sex.

I wonder, is this good or bad for the working girls? Does business increase, or does it slow down? Are people intrigued by all the scandal and smut because they secretly wish they could be just like Eliot Spitzer, and buy a woman like you buy a new car?

According to Dr. Pinsky, the press –and the nation- will be discussing this for weeks to come, trying to figure out the mechanics of prostitution. Well, that’s nothing; hookers have been around since time immemorial; they’re not disappearing anytime soon. I’m bored with it and yet I can’t stop watching; what a train wreck this is turning out to be. It’s just puzzling; if you want to self-destruct to this extent, why don’t you just go lie down in traffic during rush hour? It’s a lot cheaper. But then, I guess cavorting with a pretty young thing is much more fun.

It’s strange to hear all this, as we are getting ready for Purim; it’s the feast of Esther, when we celebrate how a Queen brought down a mighty, mighty King. Would Spitzer skip this particular holiday this year? There is a rule that during Purim, you should drink until you can no longer tell the difference between the good guy and the bad guy. If anybody has an excuse to get really drunk, it’s Spitzer, wouldn’t you agree?

To the journalists that are camped out in front of the girl’s apartment: go home; she’s not coming out. Are you kidding? She’s on the phone with Hefner, making a deal to appear in Playboy. I somehow think she will make a lot of people a lot of money.

 There it is: why did he do it?  The one question that is on everybody’s lips, and I’m pretty sure we won’t get an answer.  As always when a high ranked official does something uncharacteristic, the “experts” come out of the woodwork. It was only a matter of time until the journalists –grasping at straws, because that press conference was the shortest one in history- would bring on the sex-addiction counselors, the therapists, the psychologists and one very esteemed Harvard Law Professor.

One so-called expert (I think he was a psychologist, I’m not sure; I didn’t exactly take notes) started talking about how men in modern society aren’t allowed to show emotions. Men have certain needs, he claimed, and when they can’t express themselves, those needs start to come out in different ways. Apparently he was under the impression that Spitzer needed something that he could only get by hiring a very expensive hooker.

Hm. Vague explanation at best, and hardly worth the particular commentator’s fifteen minutes of fame.  It reminds me of my brother-in-law’s theory about how men don’t do the dishes because at heart they are still living in caves and hunting mastodons.

Before we can fret about the ‘why’, we need to first know the ‘what’. Nobody really seems to know what’s going on; unfortunately that means a lot of speculation is coming our way. It’s going to be journalism of the ‘Anna-Nicole’ type, empty, repetitive, and going nowhere.

I hope Mrs. Spitzer has unplugged her Television set permanently.