Fun With Play-Dough

In spite of the header “We have good news!” the people at the Baptist Press website are so not happy. Apparently, the abstinence hearings didn’t go as well as they’d hoped:

Rep. Henry Waxman, who is pro-choice, apparently used his position as chairman of a House committee to organize a one-sided panel of experts to attack the effectiveness of abstinence programs ahead of important funding appropriations discussions. (Source: BP website)

Well, they must pray harder then. Or…they could pull their heads out of that certain dark place, and think for a change. Teenagers want sex; it’s an undeniable fact, and they get in trouble because sex causes pregnancy and STD’s, and your solution is what? Tell them not to have it? That’s it? Wow, that’s brilliant. Why didn’t I think of that?

The one sided reporting of the Baptist Press aside, they did hit the nail on the head when they started bitching about how panelists admitted they wouldn’t fund abstinence education even if it proved effective. That’s right, suckers: that type of message is a private matter, and up to the parents. If you want to tell your own kids abstinence is a good idea, more power to you. But the taxpayers aren’t funding it; we’ve got issues with your ideology-driven solutions. Like the fact that abstinence-only education ignores comprehensive sex-ed. That’s right; we want our teenagers to be informed, not beaten into submission only to grow up thinking sex is filthy and evil, and a source of embarrassment.

Sex-ed. as the Baptists see it:

“How do you get pregnant?”

“Don’t worry about it, just don’t have sex.”

“But how do I get pregnant once I’m married?”

“Don’t worry about it, just don’t have sex.”

“What about STD’s?”

“Don’t worry about it, just don’t have sex.”

“But…”

“DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT, JUST DON’T HAVE SEX!”