Fun With Play-Dough

The good people in Brattleboro, Vermont had an extra reason to go to the polls today; they were asked to vote for arresting Bush and Cheney for crimes against the constitution, in case they ever decide to enter the town. If they get impeached, the measure is voided. Read the full article here:

http://www.bostonherald.com/news/national/northeast/view.bg?articleid=1077716

Of course it won’t have any legal consequences; but that’s not the point. The point is that voting is more than merely placing an X next to your favorite’s name; it means having an opinion, whether that opinion is wrong or right, popular or unpopular.  I think this is a nice example of being extra involved, while still keeping a sense of humor.

Kudos to Brattleboro.

J

Everybody is fussing over the long drawn out race between Obama and Hill; I’m guilty of that myself. I admit it. But then, I was thinking: maybe we should just pretend this is the general election. Frankly, I don’t really want to entertain the notion that McCain might win.

Meanwhile, Huckabee keeps on trucking. McCain will undoubtedly tie it up today, and when all the votes are in, Huckabee will finally have to leave. Or won’t he?  I wonder what that concession speech will sound like; will he apologize for staying around so long? For spending all that money, with nothing to show for it? For going on SNL and insulting us all by thinking we’ll vote for him as long as he’s funny?

I don’t think there is anything funny about a candidate that tries to get votes by doing the old song and dance about gay marriage. We know, you don’t want the gays to be happy; we get it.  Now leave.

I have decided, at the –maybe- eleventh hour I would like Hillary to win.  I think the experience argument is getting to me after all, and I still am not really clear what Obama’s stand on Israel is. And that’s not something I’d like to take risks on. Besides, all joking aside; it’s about time we have a woman in the white house, and not in the role of First Lady.

“Mrs. President”, it has a nice ring.

Being a parent is not easy; especially the first few years are a challenge. There is danger around every corner, and your children will come up with fun new ways to hurt themselves on a daily basis.

Here are some things to keep in mind when you welcome a new addition into your family:

• You child will always be one step ahead in thinking up crazy schemes; you can put as many of those corner protectors on your furniture as you want, they’ll just move on and hit their head somewhere else. Since you can’t cover your entire house in soft cushiony material, you might as well get used to it. Kids will hit their heads; it’s the law.  Let them hit their head on the first thing in sight and you’ll spare yourself a lot of energy.
• Check the washer and dryer carefully before you turn them on. Make sure there is no child hiding inside; they can make themselves very small.
• Get used to doing ALL bathroom business with the door wide open.
• For most children, eating is optional. Feeding them, however, is not.
• Don’t buy them shoes until they have to walk outside in bad weather. Otherwise they won’t wear them.
• If your child has the flu, skip the milk, no matter how they beg. It makes the puking extra nasty.
• Teach them to only eat their popsicles outside. Trust me on this one.
• Invest in the expensive cleaning products, or even better, hire someone else to do the cleaning.  No good reason to feel guilty about that.
• Don’t presume you can pick your child’s favorite animal for them. You know that atrocious purple thing your Aunt Edna gave them? That’s right; that’s the one they’ll bring everywhere.
• It doesn’t matter that you’re right. When your child is lying facedown in the middle of the supermarket aisle, screaming her head off because you won’t buy her the Disney cereal, everybody will assume you’re a bad parent. Don’t give in, or you’ll have that scene every time.
• Children never go to bed when you want them to, and they never wake up when you want them to.
• Don’t yell when you’re frustrated or angry; use the “low voice” instead. It’s scarier.
• If your child fights with another child over a toy, don’t try to reason with them. They won’t listen. Instead, put the toy in question on a really high shelf, and laugh maniacally while saying: “Now the toy’s in time out! Happy?”
• Say “I told you so” as often as possible. Kids need to be reminded that you’re smarter.
• Take pictures of embarrassing situations now to use against them later. You’ll thank yourself when they’re teenagers and try to bring home a date.