Fun With Play-Dough

Loyal McCain supporters in Cincinnati, Ohio, invited Bill Cunningham because “they thought he could help”.

Help with what? Getting press coverage? They were right about that; still, this was sort of like inviting Jeffrey Dahmer to work the nightshift at the local mortuary. (Look it up)

Cunningham seems like fun; I wonder if he does birthday parties and Bar Mitzvahs?

Is he sitting at home as we speak, hoping that Bill O’Reilly saw him on television; wondering if O’Reilly will finally reply to his emails? 

On another note: according to the Clinton campaign, it’s all the media’s fault.  Sure it is. Let’s ignore for a second that there is no such thing as one single-minded unified media, and look at what all this complaining gets us. A fantastic candidate, that should appear strong and determined, comes off instead as a whiny kindergartner, pointing fingers in all the wrong directions. Another candidate, who is supposed to defend himself against the accusation that he is a press favorite; if he is indeed the favorite of a majority of journalists, how do you think he got there?

I’ve said it before; this is not the playground, it’s politics.

I would like to be able to tell the difference.

Maybe what the Clinton campaign should acknowledge is that change is already happening. It doesn’t come from the press, and it doesn’t come from the candidates; this time it’s coming from the ones that really matter: the voters.  And that’s no joke.

Here comes another debate, and it’s time for Hill and Obama to answer some questions.  Yes, we want universal health care, yes we want better education and less student loans, and yes, we are tired of the war. But unfortunately, there are some additional issues that aren’t getting the necessary attention.

For instance,

• Will those Head-on commercials finally be outlawed?
• Can we look forward to a Hannah Montana-free existence?
• Can we do something about the weather? It’s been particularly heinous lately and we’re tired of it.
• I would like fewer golf courses and more art-house cinema; can we switch some of those?
• Strip Malls are ugly; I am sure there are some very poor but hardworking and talented design students that can help.
• Milk and tomatoes are too expensive lately; please fix.
• Tampons should be cheaper as well. I mean, it’s not as if we can actually say, hey, I’ll skip them this month.
• All eggs should be from cage free chickens. Honestly.
• More subsidies for city snow plows. I’ve had the same sheet of ice in front of my house for three months.
• There should be a mandatory day off for parents, where a government nanny comes in and lets you off the hook. Say, once a month?
• No more school vacations. Okay, maybe two weeks in the summer, but other than that, keep the little monsters in the classroom.  All you have to do is increase the teacher’s pay by 500%; trust me, a piece of cake once we stop funding this war, and the parents won’t complain. I promise. Imagine: smart kids, relaxed parents, teachers who can actually pay the rent, what’s not to like?

I will be watching tonight’s debate for any of these issues. Don’t disappoint me.